Know Your Stars: Mushroom Kingdom Edition
by JoVay
Summary: The new television series "Know Your Stars" is being shown all over the land of Mushroom Kingdom. The show is about hundreds by thousands of people being shown on live television getting facts told about them. However, are these really facts or just petty gossip? The guests will find out soon enough. Inspired by "Know Your Star" from the show "All That!".
1. Mario

Episode 1: Mario

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Mario was seen sitting in a black director's chair on a purple stage with a spotlight shining down on him, adjusting his hat.

 _Mario…_

 _He's a cheater…_

"A cheater? Me? I don't a think so." responded the red plumber raising his eyebrow confused. "I've always played fair in my party series, sports events and even go-kart races, and I've got plenty of witnesses to that."

Brushing of the lie, Mario returned to his normal composure.

 _Mario…_

 _Only saves Peach to eat her cake…_

"That's ridiculous! I love Peach and just being able to see her again is reward enough for me!" Mario shouted annoyed. "We don't need to buy each other's love!"

 _Mario…_

 _He's abusive to his brother…_

"That's awful! Where are you hearing these lies?! I would never hurt Luigi in any way! Sure we get into a few fights now and then, but he's still my little bro and we both respect each other!"

 _Mario…_

 _His mustache is fake…_

"How DARE you insult the stache! I assure you my mustache is 100% real!"

 _Mario…_

 _His fame is all caught up in his head…_

"Are you suggesting I'm some stuck up celebrity? While I appreciate the attention and special treatment, that does not mean I'll go and act like a total jerk!" shouted Mario. "I pay like everyone else, I follow the laws of the Mushroom Kingdom, I even allow BOWSER of all people to come along with me to sporting events and racing! A hero needs to keep good reputation after all!"

 _Mario…_

 _Is a serial killer…_

"I'm sorry, what? I would never fatally harm anyone! Enemy or not, I couldn't kill anyone! I spare every single trooper of Bowser or any other foe they throw at me! Killing never solves the problem!"

 _Oh yeah? What about Lava Pirahna? Didn't seem like he survived…_

"We-well, I assumed he was unconscious, I mean, he just sank into lava, right? He can survive in it!"

 _Or how about that giant wiggler down at Gelato Beach? Dissolving into sand is pretty gruesome you know…_

"I-I-I had no choice! It was blocking the warmth of the Sand Bird egg! It would have died if I didn't do something!" Mario stuttered.

 _Perhaps Glamdozer during your second space journey to space will convince you…_

"I only woke her up! She attacked on her own! It was self-defense!"

 _Now you know…_

 _Mario…_

"They know nothing!" yelled the hero. "They think I'm a ruthless, barbaric killer!"

 _Tell that to PETA...Tanooki poacher…_

"They're not...I don't think...Y-you can just…" Mario shouted thinking of a comeback.

However, he gave up and sighed and then walked off the stage in defeat.

 **Decided to work on little mini-series before I get back on track. All characters in the Mario franchise belong to Ninendo. Read and Review!**


	2. Luigi

Episode 2: Luigi

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Luigi is seen on the stage waving to the audience.

 _Luigi…_

 _He's a scaredy cat…_

"Well, I'd kinda have to agree to that" Luigi admitted sheepishly. "I'm not really someone you'd want on your "zombie apocalypse" team, but every kitten gets their claws, so that includes me too"

 _Luigi…_

 _Has NEVER been popular…_

"Now that's not true!" Luigi responded. "Remember Luigi's Mansion and its sequel? What about the Year of Luigi? Sure I'm not Mario, but there are still fans for me, so I won't need to be jealous"

 _Luigi…_

 _Wishes he was more like his older brother…_

"Sometimes, but now that I'm looking back, Mario went through some scary stuff, so I'm kind of glad that I never had to go through that" Luigi shrugged.

 _Luigi…_

 _Only joins Mario on his adventures so he can steal the spotlight…_

"Wait, what? I join Mario so that I can learn from him how to be a proper hero" Luigi defended. "Besides, we share equal credit when we save the day!"

 _Luigi…_

 _Plans to murder Mario in his sleep…_

"WHAT?! To my own bro?! Why would I-" shouted the green plumber.

 _Then pin it on Bowser…_

"That's just-!"

 _So he can become Mushroom Kingdom's new hero and take all the fame and glory for himself…_

"Woah, woah, woah. Yes Mario has more fanbase than me and Bowser IS a jerk, but I would never do anything like that to them!" Luigi shouted.

 _Now you know…_

 _Luigi…_

"No they don't! You can't just say this about me!" Luigi yelled shaking his fist.

 _Oh? And what are YOU going to do about it?_

"I'm gonna…" Luigi started. "Maybe I'll...I'll...Okay so I don't have any revenge right now, but I'll think of something!"

Luigi then walked off the stage and started grumbling to himself.

 **Maybe I'll start posting chapters just to tell you guys I'm still writing. These may not be the best episodes you'll see, but if you're patient, they'll get better. All Mario characters belong to Nintendo. Read and Review!**


	3. Peach

Episode 3: Peach

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Peach is seen waving lightly and giving a gentle smile to the audience.

 _Princess Peach…_

 _her crown is plastic…_

"I believe you are mistaken" Peach chuckled softly. "My crown is pure gold and was decorated with real rubies and sapphires"

 _Princess Peach…_

 _laces her cakes with lard…_

"No, I don't" Peach frowned. "My cakes are made with the finest ingredients in the Mushroom Kingdom, which is why they're so famous and why I decide to reward Mario with them for saving me"

 _Princess Peach…_

 _pays Bowser to kidnap her so she can have attention…_

"Now that's just an utter lie!" the pink princess snapped. "I would never pay Bowser to do something like that to me!"

 _Princess Peach…_

 _she falls in love with every kidnapper she has…_

"That is completely false!" Peach shouted. "My love has and will always be for Mario! No one could ever take his place!'

 _Princess Peach…_

 _steals coins from Toadsworth for her own needs…_

"STEAL?!" gasped the princess. "And from Toadsworth no less?! That man has been like family to me since I was an infant! I refuse to stand here and let you continue to soil the royal family's name!"

 _Now you know…_

 _Princess Peach…_

"All they know are lies! You obviously know I'm the PRINCESS of the Mushroom Kingdom, so start treating me like one!" Peach angrily shouted.

 _My bad…_

"Thank you, now I-"

 _Now you know…_

 _her highness…_

"Such insolence!"

Peach huffed and stormed off the stage.

 **Meh, I could do better. It's also the shortest one yet... All Mario characters belong to Nintendo, yada yada. R &R.**


	4. Daisy

Episode 4: Daisy

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Daisy is seen giving somewhat of a sassy pose and flipped her hair.

 _Princess Daisy…_

 _her natural hair color is green…_

"What do I look like to you, a walking pickle?" Daisy questioned furrowing her brow. "My hair is naturally ginger and I plan to keep it that way"

 _Princess Daisy…_

 _hates the color green…_

"That's totally a lie!" Daisy exclaimed. "I happen to let you know that my boyfriend wears green!"

 _Princess Daisy…_

 _is terrible at sports…_

"Dude, have you SEEN me play?" Daisy retorted. "I seriously kicked butt in last year's tennis competition, so must be blind if can't see how awesome I am at sports!"

 _Princess Daisy…_

 _her cruise ship is actually a smuggling boat…_

"You jerk!" Daisy shouted with hostility. "I made that ship so my friends and I could do some relaxing when the world isn't completely insane! Do have any idea what we have to go through to deserve these vacations?!"

 _Princess Daisy…_

 _has a secret crush on Waluigi…_

"Not in a billion years!" shouted the princess in disbelief. "I wouldn't go out with that stick figure even if he paid me to! In fact, I'd rather have my crown shredded into dust and then be stripped of this dress right now than even be HUGGED by that creep!"

 _Princess Daisy…_

 _just confirmed she hates skinny guys…_

"That's not what I said at all! Nothing in that statement said anything about that!" Daisy angrily growled.

 _Now you know…_

 _Princess Daisy, the hater of all skinny men and likes them chunky…_

"Shut up! Whoever you are, when I get my hands on you, you won't even recognize yourself! Do you hear me?! I'll find you! Don't you ignore me!"

The princess then walked off the stage furiously, pretty much with smoke coming out of her ears.

 **I find it hard sometimes to make good ideas. All rights go to Nintendo. Read and Review!**


	5. Yoshi

Episode 5: Yoshi

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Yoshi is standing on the stage and stretched his arms in the air.

 _Yoshi…_

 _is transexual…_

"I'm pretty sure I'm just male," the green dino responded tilting his head. "You see, Yoshis have different reproductive organs, and yes both genders can produce eggs, but only males can produce young. I mean, seahorses do the same thing, right?"

 _Yoshi…_

 _uses unborn eggs as weaponry…_

"What? What gave you that idea? We Yoshis only use enemy eggs and artificial eggs to attack! We would never use our FUTURE as projectiles!" Yoshi explained a bit tiffed.

 _Yoshi…_

 _eats babies…_

"Okay, I know for a fact that's totally a lie!" Yoshi fumed. "If we Yoshis actually eat babies, the hero you know as Mario wouldn't be here! Who's giving you this stuff?"

 _Yoshi…_

 _he's fat…_

"HEY! I have you know I'm an average size for a Yoshi!" the dino yelled offended. "Just because we eat a lot doesn't mean we're all fat!"

 _Yoshi…_

 _is against fat people…_

"That's not what I meant! Mario...well, he's kind of on the pudgy side and Wario and I get along fine...I think…" Yoshi whispered trying to back himself up.

 _Now you know…_

 _Yoshi, the dinosaur who hates fat people…_

"Didn't you hear what I said?! I'm not fat and I don't hate fat people! Hello?! Can we do this again? I wanna start over!" Yoshi complained as the spotlights dimmed out.

 **Pretty short for something like this...I couldn't think of anything good for Yoshi, so this happened. Don't worry, I plan to eventually give rematches for the characters in the far future. No Nintendo stuff goes to me. Read and Review!**


	6. Wario

Episode 6: Wario

Know Your Stars: Wario

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Wario is seen on the stage picking his nose and then puts his hands on his fat belly.

 _Wario…_

 _wants his mustache to be like Mario's…_

"Pffft! No way!" the greedy adult spat while twisting his mustache slightly. "Why would I want to change such a manly and awesome stache like this?"

 _Wario…_

 _is living on the streets…_

"I happen to own millions of dollars from my gaming company!" Wario retorted. "Of course, then I blow it all off, but I could make another million-making game in no time!"

 _Wario…_

 _he's all brawn and no brain…_

"Are you calling me stupid?!" Wario yelled angrily.

 _Wario…_

 _he's losing his hearing as well as his intelligence…_

"Come over here and say that to my face! You want brawn?! I'll show you brawn!" Wario scowled cracking his knuckles.

 _Wario…_

 _likes to eat boogers…_

"Wait how did yo-" Wario started but then stopped himself. "I-I-I mean...no I don't!"

 _Wario…_

 _sold a box of kittens to a gang of poachers for a dollar…_

"Are you TRYING to mess with me?!" Wario growled.

 _Now you know…_

 _Wario, the brainless, booger-eating, kitten-killing hobo…_

"No they don't!"

 _Yes they do…_

"Shut up! Whoever you are, I'll be seeing you in court!" Wario yelled shaking his fist. "As soon as I find a lawyer...who hasn't sued me first…"

Wario trudged off the stage, mumbling to himself.

 **Yay! More short chapters and copyright stuff! Mario characters belong to Nintendo and also Read and Review!**


	7. Waluigi

Episode 7: Waluigi

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Walugi is seen on the stage with his arms crossed with a smug expression on his face.

 _Waluigi…_

 _Is a vegetarian…_

"Look, just because I'm all skinny doesn't mean I don't get any protein, alright?" Waluigi remarked rolling his eyes. "I can't just live off loser food like broccoli and cauliflower you know"

 _Waluigi…_

 _Runs a smuggling ring…_

"Hey! I wouldn't stoop so low like that and even if I would, my personal life would be none of your beeswax!" Waluigi shouted.

 _Waluigi…_

 _Is homeless…_

"I'm not some dirty peasant! I make a great deal of money from sports tournaments...sometimes…"

 _Waluigi…_

 _Loves bombs…_

"Well, I suppose that's fine" Waluigi shrugged. "The power, the simple structure and the fact they create something awesome is-"

 _Because he knows he will be forever alone…_

"What?! No, I don't mean it like that! And I CAN get a lady if I wanted to! It's just that no lady has passed my expectations!"

 _Waluigi…_

 _Can't accept the truth…_

"What truth?! All you've been doing is spew lies! I'm the real liar around here!" Waluigi refuted.

 _Waluigi…_

 _Just confirmed that all of his past statements were lies…_

"Wait, that not what I meant!"

 _Waluigi…_

 _Needs some serious help…_

"Shut up! The only help I need is how to kick your butt when I find out who you are!" Waluigi threatened.

 _Now you know…_

 _Waluigi…_

"I hate you, you know that?" growled Waluigi. "It hasn't even been five minutes and I already want to punch you in the face. That's a new record in my book"

Waluigi clenched his fists and walked off the stage in anger.

 _Good luck with creeping out the ladies, sticky!_

The voice laughed as an insulted Waluigi left.

 **I found this a bit hard to do as I found next to nothing about Waluigi, being a character stuck to spin-off games. All characters belong to Nintendo. Read and Review! Peace!**


	8. Bowser

Episode 8: Bowser

* * *

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Bowser was seen on the stage with his arms crossed and a look of pride on his face.

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _Never brushes his teeth…_

"Uh, yes I do! How do think I get this awesome grin?" refuted the king, showing off his fangs.

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _Has a full sized model of Peach to snuggle with...aww…_

"Hey! No I don't! Yes, Peach is amazing, I'll give you that!" Bowser shouted. "But what you just said is just both creepy and plain sad"

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _Is abusive to his children…_

"Now that's going to far, buddy!" hissed Bowser. "Being a parent is tough, especially when you're ruling an entire kingdom, but I would NEVER go as far as abusing my own kids!"

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _Likes to play with dolls and wear dresses when no one is looking…_

"Why you little!" Bowser growled. "Come down and say that to my face! I'll smash you to a pulp!"

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _Refuses to kidnap Daisy because he's afraid he'll get beaten up by a tomboy…_

"How dare you mock me! I could kidnap that yellow witch if I wanted to!" Bowser yelled, having smoke coming out of his nose.

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _Wants his children to be just like him…_

"Well, in a wa-" Bowser started.

 _Because he was a total failure in his own life…_

"I have you know that I rule my own kingdom, thank you very much! Now leave my kids out of this!"

 _King Bowser Koopa…_

 _One time sent his kids to the dungeon for five days and fed them table scraps because of failed mission to beat Mario…_

"What did I just say?!" the koopa barked. "I do punish my kids for that, yes, but wouldn't starve them just for something like that!"

 _Now you know…_

 _Bowser…_

"No they don't!"

 _I think they do…_

"Well I THINK you need to put a sock in it buddy! Don't you know who I am?!"

 _Yes, a failure of a single king who takes his anger out on his children…_

At this point, Bowser had enough and roared as loud as he could, which cut the power on the stage lights. Bowser stomped off the stage into the darkness.

* * *

 **Heh, I can only laugh when I picture Bowser in a dress. Read and Review! Peace!**


	9. Rosalina

Episode 9: Rosalina

* * *

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Rosalina is seen on stage holding her hands together and giving a small smile.

 _Rosalina…_

 _She's old…_

Rosalina gave a slight chuckle. "Well, that goes without saying, but considering the comet I travel on arrives on this planet every one hundred years, I suppose one may suspect my age"

 _And it shows!_

Rosalina frowned at this. "While I may have been around for some time, that does not mean that time has changed my physical features"

 _Rosalina…_

 _Doesn't know how to cook…_

"I must say that statement is false" Rosalina calmly disagreed. "I am actually very talented at culinary, as I must be aware of this kind of knowledge for I have many children"

 _Rosalina…_

 _Is so ancient that she knows nothing about technology…_

Rosalina sighed. "Again with my age? I would've thought you could've come up with more original material. And I happen to know quite a bit about modern technology, thank you"

 _Rosalina…_

 _Refers to her children as lumas because can't remember any of their names…_

A bit more frustrated, Rosalina gave a stern look on her face. "I ask of you to keep my family out of this charade and I happen to know and remember each and every one of my children's names from the the back of my mind"

 _Rosalina…_

 _Secretly sold the power stars to Bowser…_

"Excuse me?"

 _Then betrayed him to help Mario to make herself look good…_

"I would never do such a terrible act like that, especially if it meant endangering my own family for my own selfish needs" the space princess calmly argued. "I refuse to stand here and let you ruin my good image"

 _Now you know…_

 _Rosalina…_

"I cannot say they do"

 _I can! I'm just a voice and there is nothing you can do to stop me…_

Rosalina just sighed in frustration. "It was a mistake to participate in this…"

The princess the levitated of the stage slowly and left.

* * *

 **I felt a little bad for writing this as personally I think that Rosalina is a great character with an amazing and dramatic backstory and a likable personality. However, any Mario fan reading this knew she'd be up on stage sooner or later. Anyways, read and review and stay OUT OF THIS WORLD! Peace!**


	10. Toad

Episode 10: Toad

* * *

 _Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars, Know Your Stars…_

Toad is shown on the stage straightening out his blue vest and smiles at the audience.

 _Toad…_

 _Is wearing a diaper…_

Toad sighed, "Yeah, this is something lots of people mistake these things for, but I assure you that these are just simply our cultured wearings and that I am completely potty-trained."

 _Toad…_

 _Needs a booster seat to drive his go-kart…_

"I'm very sure I can drive without the need of a booster seat," Toad assured. "Go-karts and other vehicles aren't just limited to being used by humans you know."

 _Toad…_

 _Is a total pushover…_

"A pushover? I may be considered small, but I'm no weakling," Toad argued. "I've helped Mario multiple times during his adventures and if the were here, the'd back me up...right?"

 _Toad…_

 _His hat is actually a mind-eating parasite…_

"Where are you getting this information from?" Toad asked started to get peeved. "Do I look like a zombie to you or something? Stop trying to make me look bad!"

 _Toad…_

 _Likes Toadette…_

"Well yeah, of course I do, she's my sister after all." Toad said.

 _Really likes Toadette…_

"Uh...yeah, I do, she's pretty much my other half in life."

 _Really, REALLY likes Toadette…_

Toad finally caught onto what the voice was implying.

"Hold on, what exactly are you trying to say?!" Toad demanded.

 _Toad…_

 _Is denying that the has forbidden feelings for his sister…_

"Ugh! That's sick!" Toad exclaimed in disgust. "Just because we're the opposite gender doesn't mean our relationship is like that!"

 _Now you know…_

 _Toad…_

"Are you serious? They don't know anything!" Toad shouted angrily. "I am capable of driving on my own, I am not weak, I am not a parasite and I CERTAINLY do not have THOSE feelings for my own sister!"

 _Sure you don't…_

" _I'm outta here!" Toad huffed walking off the stage. "I should've known something smelled fishy here!"_

* * *

 **Man, how long has it been since this series got updated? I seriously need to focus more on Fanfiction whenever I have the time, don't I? Anyways, it's posted and that's all that matters to me...okay, maybe not because I still have three other stories I need to work on. Toad and any other Mario characters belong to Nintendo. Read and Review! Peace for now!**


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